1. Self Help

Self Discovery – The How

Hi there! Thanks for coming back, if you haven’t yet, do check out the first part of this series Self discovery The WHAT? before going on with this. Having shared a bit on what self discovery means, I’ll be sharing a few tips that has helped me so far and also some contributions from some amazing friends. Now the big question, how do you go about self discovery?

  • Be patient with yourself– As much as we’d love to, we can’t know all about ourselves in a day, month, year even. It takes time and impatience would only yield to frustration in the end, especially when it feels like a dead-end.
  • Make conscious efforts – Like I mentioned in the last post, self discovery is an intentional process and requires conscious efforts and there are a lot of resources one could put to use for example, take personality tests online, write an ‘essay’ on everything you know about yourself, create a list of questions you need answers to, questions like “What do I love doing?” “What makes me happy?” What gifts do I have?” “What do I want to use such gift for?” Questions like this makes you aware of what you’re looking for and what you need to know.
  • Don’t be afraid to ASK, ASK, ASK – Never be ashamed or afraid to ask help from others. I once conducted a poll asking if it’s possible for someone else to know about you more than you know yourself and quite a good number answered yes. Put the human resources you have around you to good use, ask close friends, families, those you feel are very observant and know you well, don’t see it as just an avenue to fish for compliments, ask for sincere responses about what they see in you. I did this once and was definitely glad I did. Ask trusted voices for their honest opinion about who you are, right or wrong, it’ll help direct your path.
  • Take risks- Be willing to step out of your comfort zone and take risks that seem taking (Edward Whitacre Jr). Of course it might seem daunting, impossible even but at the end, it’s a lot more interesting and self enlightening. Challenge yourself to tasks, risks that expose you to you, that makes you aware of your abilities and skills. The best things in life are often waiting for you at the exit ramp of your comfort zone – Karen Salmansonh
  • Analyse your past and future- Sometimes, it’s best for you to distance yourself from the present and objectively analyse your past and future. Note your mistakes and achievements from the past, the choices you made and what that shows about who you are. To read more about this, check out What to do with your past.
  • Stay open minded- Be open as much as you can to all possibilities. Ruling our potential outcomes outlines for most of misdirection in discovery. Don’t rule out truths about yourself before you even discover them, good or bad, you can never tell until you have an experience.
  • Be true to who you are- know your thoughts, beliefs and logic distinguished from that of others and stick with them. This doesn’t automatically mean whatever you believe it’s right but it pays to know where one stands. You are a human with a distinctive rational thinking and reasoning. Encourage that and vocalize it. Feel free to think and express your opinions on your career, religion, society, politics and so on and of course listen to others’ too. Most importantly, be your own person and have a mind of your own.
  • Know your passion– Understand what drives you, what moves you to action? what do you want to do about it? what’s the end goal? Something you’ll be willing to sacrifice for in a heartbeat, remember when you find something to live for, you find something to die for.
  • Find a life mentor- Honestly, I’ve heard this from quite a number of people and it has been of help to most. Finding someone to trust and walk through the good and bad of life helps. It should be someone who sees and understands life as you do, even better. Someone successful in a field you’re interested in, who’s walked or is walking in the same path as you.
  • Have a career path – A career path should be a pointer to what you’re interested in. You definitely do not want to spend a good deal of your life doing something you don’t love just to make ends meet.

I’m not a professional and still very much on this self discovery journey myself but I do hope this helps someone out there. Many thanks to those that contributed. Please do well to share with your friends to read and also drop your comments. Thanks for reading!

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