What comes to mind when you hear the word vulnerability in context of relationships? Do you see it as deep? weak? intimidating? For me? it’s scary.
Vulnerability is one word that pretty much did not exist in my vocabulary until recent years. It wasn’t exactly something I grew up hearing or something I understood or felt the need for. Thankfully however, I do understand it a little better now and I’m growing in it but what does being vulnerable actually mean?
Like a friend shared with me, it is being willing to cut open the onion of mystery surrounding oneself to others.
Also, vulnerability is being willing to ask for help. As a matter of fact, [bctt tweet=”Vulnerability is being human, plain and simple. Except it’s not, it’s a risk but one worth taking. ” username=”conversehouse”]
Imagine being completely naked in front of someone and just striking a conversation like it’s no big deal, that’s how vulnerability is in a relationship, except you get to keep your clothes on but every single emotional baggage comes off, every wall is broken down and they get to see all of who you are on the inside. Why would one do this, you might ask?
Vulnerability is in fact a huge risk but nonetheless one worth taking.
Yes, it is a risk but nonetheless one worth taking. But why? Sharing from what I’ve learnt:
- It provides comfort: they say a problem shared is half solved. Sometimes it doesn’t even matter if the said person has a solution for you or not. There’s just something that comes with being able to share with someone who wouldn’t judge you but on the contrary help you walk through whatever it is.
- It builds you: Although vulnerability is often perceived as a form of weakness, it actually takes a lot of strength to be vulnerable. It shows one is willing to let go of whatever pride or fear. I know for me, the number one obstacle to being vulnerable is not wanting the other party to think less of me and even though that fear might always be there, it shouldn’t be an obstacle.
- It strengthens the relationship: it showcases trust and creates a safe space for the other party to also be vulnerable with you, creating avenues for helping each other.
You might ask what exactly this vulnerability looks like, how does one practice vulnerability in relationships? Well vulnerability is asking for help when needed (enough of the “I can figure it out on my own” mentality), it is accepting help when offered (permit me to say not doing this could be a form of pride). Vulnerability is admitting to your faults and your flaws.
Now, I know this could be a touchy concept, you might have been hurt in the past from being vulnerable with someone that later proved to be undeserving about it. Truth is, vulnerability is hard and easier said than done but again being vulnerable is being human. Shows you’re strong enough to let people in, human enough to be hurt when it goes awry and even stronger to grow from the experience. Allow yourself to be human. [bctt tweet=”Truth is, vulnerability is hard and easier said than done but again being vulnerable is being human. Shows you’re strong enough to let people in, human enough to be hurt when it goes awry and even stronger to grow from the experience. Allow yourself to be human. ” username=”conversehouse”]
I’d love to hear your thoughts. What do YOU think about vulnerability in relationships?
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